General List

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Happy Families Eat Lard

I dunno about you, but I love me some fat!

This shirt works for everyone, example:

If you're a hipster, wear this shirt as a silent protest against the money hungry fast food industry that is spiraling our society into obesity.

If you're a loser and have no friends, just buy it and wear it out every chance you get. We guarantee people will come up to you and ask you about the awesome shirt you're wearing.

If you're like the rest of us and just think it's a great shirt, buy two.

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Chain Smoking Monkey Skull and Crossbones

What's a Pirates favorite Movie?
Reservoir Grogs!

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.........

Besides me, what looks good on any swash buckler? This CSM shirt of course. With a fiesty skull and cigarettes for crossbones, this shirt looks good on anyone. Including ugly people.

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Sophisticated Gentleman

Do you like the morals and slower pace of the 50's? Enjoy wearing bow ties? Sticking things in your mouth? If so, this shirt's for you. With his dapper good looks, sensual stare, let our Sophisticated Gentleman make you feel like a man.

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No Shirt, No hair, No problem

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Don't like to wear shirts? Only wear jackets? Wanna spend some money today? This section is for you!

Get your hands on our Chain Smoking Monkey pin. The pin is ONLY $1 and is the size of a typical band pin. Clip this little bugger to a jacket, bag, hat, bare skin, your dog, cat,- really anywhere you want!

Like so many truckers and residents of trailer parks, the trucker hat will never get old and will always have a core fan base. Our black and white mesh trucker hate features our CSM logo and company name on it. The hat is ONLY $12 and we can't think of a better way to cover up your head from the harmful rays of the sun and possible skin cancer. What? Can't we care about the well being of our customers?

Chain Smoking Monkey Productions

Buy our clothing

Listed below are original Chain Smoking Monkey shirts all made with love and the blood/sweat of little hands in Argentina. If you want to order ANYTHING (and we mean anything), write us an e-mail about the design and size you want.

CSM@CHAINSMOKINGMONKEY.COM

All of our shirts are available in a men's Medium, Large or X-Large.

All shirts are ONLY $15 and shipping to ANYWHERE in the U.S. of A is ONLY $5. No matter how much you order, the shipping will ALWAYS ONLY be $5. How can we keep the prices so low you ask? We're crazy, that's how. We're crazy.

Can you do calculus in your sleep? Are you a rocket scientist? Me neither. Would you like to pretend that you are?...*hint hint*

If you like the Matrix, numbers, and buying awesome shirts this design is for you! It will hug your nubile chest like a baby walrus. Wait, what? I dunno, it's better than doing meth.

This guy! This guy right here!

This is by far our most popular shirt. The CSM Production company logo is displayed prominently on the front of the shirt, while a smaller version of the logo is on the back of the shirt near the neckline. This logo actually appears on the back of ALL of our shirts. No need to thank us, were just generous people.

Who doesn't like to take bubble baths? Communists, that's who!

What better way to show your support for the American people than to wear a shirt that depicts one of our hero's, the rubber duck. Wear him proudly on your chest in all his vibrant Yellow and Orange glory. Didn't you know? Yellow and Orange is the new Red, White and Blue.

Ah, can you smell the freedom.

Wow. Wow. Wow.

If you can read, you will love this little gem. Our amazing company name is sprawled across your chest for all to see. What more could someone ask for?.......On second thought, don't answer that.

Okay. I know what you're thinking, "What is that thing? Is it a dog, a cat, maybe some kind of monkey".....

Answer: Who cares what it is, it's an awesome shirt that you should be wearing. So buy one. No, no, make that two. Buy two.

Nicotine

Original Chain Smoking Monkey

Rubber Duck Influence

Beating Heart In Skelton

CSM text